Journey into Insanity

2003-01-31T19:35:00.000Z

No internet yesterday, apart from the early morning.

So, did I use that freedom from distraction wisely? Work like mad and increase my word count exponentially?

Um, well.... No, not really. It's not that I didn't try, it's that things were coming far too slowly, even though I did find a perfect name for the pub. I thought about it last night, and this morning I figured out why-- I was trying to write that scene too early. So I turned Chapter 1 into Chapter 2 and started fresh this morning-- much, much better. Plus, I found the perfect name for the bookshop. Plus, more plot twist potential and quirky but loveable characters (or at least I hope so).

I was really getting into it when I had to stop. Will try to get up early enough tomorrow to put in a couple hours before the husband awakens and I won't be able to work.

Total word count: 2985.

(But it seems like so much more! I wonder what it is in pages?)

2003-01-29T18:44:00.000Z

1270 words today, plus a lot of work on upcoming plot and scenes-- nothing definite, as I don't want to get too far ahead of myself or accidentally preclude myself from a neat idea.

I am feeling quite optimistic!

Total word count: 1787.

2003-01-28T17:49:00.000Z

Today, I started my second novel.

It's a murder mystery. I've been thinking about it for a while, and no, I have absolutely no clue who dunnit. I'll figure that out later. Plenty of time for that!

My second novel.

I absolutely love the sound of that.

Today's word count: 517. (Hey, it's the prologue.)

2002-11-27T07:14:00.000Z

Yesterday's Word Count: 3983.
Current Grand Total: 52,100 by my math, 52,096 by Word Perfect, which never, ever gives one the benefit of the doubt.

In other words, I am finished. It's true. Not just over 50K, but I wrote a real ending for it. Moreover, it's a real ending that I'm pretty happy with, although it's a wee bit melodramatic, partly because I wanted to stick in all sorts of little bits so I didn't forget about them in the rewrite. I can live with that, though. Nothing that the judicious application of the delete key won't solve.

Next year, I'm doing something more frothy. Fan fic or something I can just churn out a plot for that only needs 50,000 words. Although I can't really see myself doing fan fic-- I'd probably get stuck in the middle. I'm sure I'll come up with something.

I also spent yesterday doing more mounds of laundry, and taking my boots to the cobbler, and cooking for Saturday's feast, and all sorts of other things that I've been neglecting shamefully. Basically, I just looked around our apartment and said to myself: Holy shit, what happened here? Oh yeah.... NaNoWriMo.

Hey wait-- two paragraphs ago, did I just say next year?

Oh, yeah. Guess I did.

2002-11-25T21:14:00.000Z

Today's Word Count: 3024.
Current Grand Total: 48,117.

Less than two thousand to go. If I'm picky, it's 1,883. I should hit fifty thousand tomorrow, but of course I won't be done yet. I think I can bring it to some sort of conclusion on Wednesday, though. At least I hope I can.

It seems to be going very well again. It was slowing down there for a bit. I've decided to end it, which I can do in somewhat good conscience, then go back and add in the missing bits. This may change the ending, of course. I don't care. I think this one is worth finishing off properly.

That, or I'm deluding myself. It happens.

2002-11-23T16:11:00.000Z

Today's Word Count: 1308.
Current Grand Total: 45,096.

Finally

2002-11-22T19:36:00.000Z

Today's Word Count: 3359.
Current Grand Total: 43,785.

I really wanted to hit 45,000 words today. Insane, I know, but I'm that way sometimes. If I'm insane at the moment, it's buried under all the vacantness filling my head. I just feel. . . . hollow. Time to quit, methinks.

Also, it's nice to have friends. Really nice. I love you all a lot. But less with the phone calls and text messages and so forth, OK? I'm trying to write a novel here.

I went back and started things off with the chapter before the chapter I was working on yesterday. Which may or may not make sense, I'm too scattered, brainwise, to know. Anyway, yesterday's chapter was in the wrong voice. I can still use it-- I hadn't gotten to the juicy bits yet, so little if any rewrites will be needed. I just need to do the significant things from the Claire's point of view, first. I feel much better about it now.

I've also been thinking about it, and I can finish the story by Wednesday, and in a way that I feel comfortable with. I can always go back to flesh it out and tie up loose ends later, should I so choose.

So, a good day. Time to hit the bar. Or, very possibly, bars.

Who am I kidding?

2002-11-21T20:16:00.000Z

Today's Word Count: 2,796.
Current Grand Total: 40,426.

Yep, I hit 40K today. I was determined to do it, too. The further along I get, the more that I want this damn thing to be over with. I'm not sure why, things are going along just swimmingly.

It's probably because I now realize that it won't be over when I cross the magic 50,000 word line. There's just too much plot left to cover, and even if I go into pure, linear narration at this point, it just won't cover it. Well, it could, I suppose-- at this rate I should be able to go over the 50K easily-- but it just won't be very good. Not as good as I would like it to be, in any case. And it means leaving out all the little side stories and so forth that have developed along the way.

I have a very real feeling that the random little side stories are the best bits. I'm not sure if that's good or bad, to be honest. What I am sure of is that I'm 80 percent finished according to word count, but maybe only half way, plot-wise, which means I'm going to have to ram the plot through, then go back later and expand. That, or just keep going forward, and see how far I get, even if I don't actually finish the story before the deadline. Which kind of isn't the point, is it? The point is to write a novel, at least 50K words long, start to finish, in one month.

And when did I start caring whether this damn thing was good or not, anyway? It's supposed to be a piece of crap. A finished piece of crap, but crap all the same.

You know those novels, where you're engrossed in what's going on, and really getting into it, and then all of a sudden a bunch of things happen and it's all over, and you, The Reader, are left feeling kind of cheated and pissed off?

I think I know how that happens, now.

2002-11-20T21:55:00.000Z

Yesterday's Word Count: 1607.
Today's Word Count: 2430.
Current Total: 37,630, and very grand it is, too.

I didn't post the word counts yesterday, because by the time I managed to get enough words, I was seriously late for the pub. I didn't drink much, though. It's pretty sad when you don't feel well enough to drink, although I'm convinced that the beer soothed my aching throat. At the very least, it made me care about it less.

I did my Portuguese before class this morning. I can be such a slacker sometimes. But hey, at least I did it.

I woke up today feeling like I'd just been scraped off the bottom of someone's shoe. Not very pleasant, to say the least. Currently, I just feel like I've been stepped on.

The E key is still hanging in there, as am I.

2002-11-19T17:18:00.000Z

Yesterday's word count was 2108, for a grand total of 33,493.

The E key is still hanging in there.

I think Blogger ate yesterday's update. That, or I just plain forgot to do it. I remember doing it, though given the way my brain has been functioning lately, that doesn't really count for much.

Meetings all day today, and now it's raining, the wind is howling, and it's as cold as hell in here. All of which makes it hard to start today's installment.

But it won't start itself, now, will it?

Even though I haven't even started my Portuguese homework.

2002-11-16T20:11:00.000Z

Yipee! I've finally broken the 30K barrier. Yes indeedy, I am now the proud owner of a total word count of 31,485.

I am 63 percent finished! Which doesn't sound quite as impressive as 31.5K, now that I think about it.

In other triumphs, I managed to avoid killing the cat. Elvis has spent the day thoughtfully watching TV and leaving me alone to work in our escritorio with the door closed. Which is something Calliope absolutely hates in any door. If she's in, she wants out. If she's out, she wants in.

Very loudly.

Mind you, now that I've knocked off for the day, she is neither seen nor heard. Go figure.

Oh, and I managed to semi-repair the E key. It's not on there in a truly stable and long lasting way, but a loose key beats that nipple thing any day.

Today's word count: 2445.

(Actually, when I ran it, it came up 2500 even and I was pretty impressed with myself. Then I realized that I had already written 55 words of the chapter yesterday.)

2002-11-15T22:07:00.000Z

Today's Word Count is brought to you by the Letter E.

It might as well do something, as it's not on my keyboard anymore. It was sticking, see, so I jiggled it a bit, and it popped right off. No problem, thinks I, pop it back on. So I checked for stray dirt and cat hair, and tried to pop it back on. No go. I tried shoving, and shoving and swearing, and pressing real hard and swearing, and then the little bracket thing that it's supposed to latch on to came off. So I spent half an hour trying to reassemble it, and the upshot is No More E.

I can still make an E, as you might have noticed. Just not with a nice, flat, ergonomic key. Instead I've got this squishy little teat thing, and it's slowing me down, as well as torturing my forearm and annoying the crap out of me.

Do you know how much one uses an E? Pretty often, right?

Wrong, it's much more often than that.

2500 today, for a total word count of 29,040.

(Yes, it really was exact. I don't know how I do it.)

2002-11-14T20:33:00.000Z

3561 words.

My head is spinning. My wrists and hands are doing suprisingly well, considering, and my back only twinges a little. I put this down to yesterday's inspired idea of using a different chair at my desk. A higher chair. With a cushion. Duh.

This is getting harder as I go along. I'm getting more and more bits of plot swarming around in my head, and now I have to decide which order to put them into. It was so much easier just to grab whatever random idea occurred to me and pump it for every word it was worth.

Great big encouraging thing: I'm over half done, and it's still the fourteenth. Mind you, I've been forced to impose an artificially early deadline on myself, seeing as how I'm now doing a full Thanksgiving dinner for God knows how many (fourteen, I'm guessing) on the thirtieth. This will require at least two full days of shopping and cooking, although I'm seriously considering renting a car for the occasion. But I digress.

Total word count: 26, 540.

Holy shit.

2002-11-14T00:07:00.000Z

Today's grand total is 2776, which beats the shit out of yesterday's, what was it... 1003.

Not that I didn't do a lot yesterday. Wrote tons, in fact, just not for the novel. I thought about pasting it in, like I considered doing with my journal entries, but I rejected that idea, too. Having a conscience is a real bitch sometimes.

I will finish. I will not cheat.

Unless I get really, really desperate, that is.

2002-11-11T22:25:00.000Z

I seem to have turned into procrastination's bitch. Really. I even did a load of laundry. Not that I am a stranger to the entire laundry experience, but I don't usually do it at 7 pm. And I never do two loads in one day.

My back is in agony and left forearm is killing me, but not my right, which is something I suppose. And I've finally got my lot out of the pub-- I really thought that chapter would never end.

2015 words today, for a grand total of 19145. I thought about pushing on for an even 20K, but screw that. I'm going to go slide in a Buffy DVD and veg out with my husband.

2002-11-11T09:25:00.000Z

It's not enough that I spend every spare waking moment working on this novel, apparently. Now I've started dreaming about it, too. Nothing so useful as dreaming about my characters, or what I should write about. Oh, no. I just spent the night dreaming about typing. No hints as to content, just words on the screen and me typing away on my laptop. Perhaps my brain is trying to punish me for spending all day yesterday at the pub, instead being here in front of at the computer.

2002-11-09T19:32:00.000Z

2020 words today, for a Grand Total of 17130 thus far.

It was like pulling teeth today, honestly. I procrastinated quite effectively, if I do say so myself. Once I got going, it was OK: it's the getting going part that was a problem.

Last night we did manage not to stay out until 5 am, which was good until I realized that 4 am isn't really a notable improvement. I suspect this is directly related to the procrastination problem above. I just couldn't think effectively. How did Hemmingway ever do it?

Well, aside from the fact that he was a genius, that is.

On the bright side: no character name changes today.

On the scary side: we're going out again tonight....

2002-11-08T19:14:00.000Z

Word Count: 15110.

Go me!

I managed to get quite a bit done today, despite a late start, which I made even later by discovering a nifty website about names and their meanings on the nanowrimo forums. What I was even doing in the forums before getting my words done we won't discuss, ok?

Anyway, I picked out a new name for my main male protag. I changed it back to name number three I picked out for him yesterday. He's gonna have to live with it.

As long as I was there, I checked out the meaning of some other names that I am happy with. Simon, for example, means good listener. Perfect! And Gary means spear carrier which is also perfect because that character is pretty much.... well, he is a spear carrier. Also light comic relief, of course. And I have a feeling that about ten thousand words from now he's going to take a rather important picture. Actually, I'm finding more spears for Gary to carry every single day.

Things are going well. It's coming together quite nicely, in fact. So well, that I'm going out tonight. If I can only resist staying out until 5 am, they should go well tomorrow, too.

Fingers crossed.

2002-11-07T17:57:00.000Z

Word Count: 12012.

Not as many as I would have liked, but I'll take it. Not too bad, really, considering that I had a long (too long) meeting today, and that I'm going out tonight. I got 1730 words today, so I can do so with a clear conscience.

Not, mind you, that I would have stayed home or anything if I didn't.

Oddly enough, I'm not as far along in the story as I would have thought. My characters have a lot of things to say, I suppose. A lot of expository writing that will vanish in the second draft, or be reassigned elsewhere (assuming there will be a second draft, that is), but over a third of it is pure dialogue, which is good.

One character name change today. I think that one's going to change again, too, as I'm still not convinced it's right. Oh well, minor minor thing. I'm happy it's not paralyzing me. Hey, call him Weenie and just get on with it, ya know?

2002-11-06T20:58:00.000Z

Word Count: 10281.

Yes! I've broken the 10K barrier.

And I'm ahead-- if I hadn't missed days and did the average minimum, I'd only be needing 10002. The extras will come in handy, though, because tomorrow will be a busy day indeed. I still hope to get 1600, though. I'll squeeze it in somehow.

Still not going too badly, considering. My main female demanded a name change, and refused to settle for a global replace later on, so I gave it to her. Still finding out more about my characters as I go along.

This would almost be fun if my back didn't hurt so bad.

I'm off for a beer.

10281. I'm so excited. I think I can do this after all.

2002-11-05T20:04:00.000Z

Word Count: 7611.

I'm catching up. I'm only short 724 words from where I'd be if I hadn't gone out of town, and stayed home to do my requisite 1667 words a day. No sweat.

I feel better today, too. I'm off the cold medication, as well.

This insanity is worth it already, though. I'm learning things. Did you know my main female character had a sister? Me neither. And that employee of hers? What a pistol, eh?

I still may be a bit too worried about having clean copy. That's just how I am, and I'll just have to learn to accept it. Not, mind you, that I think it's a bad thing. But I have been able to move on from the "that's too much expository writing, save it for later, go back and redo it now" type of thinking. Because, you know, I can go back and move things around, thanks to the miracles of modern technology.

Just get it written. Fix it later.

It's hard for me, though. But I'm trying. And it seems to be working.

It's all good.

2002-11-04T22:57:00.000Z

I was feeling a bit burnt out on the novel, so I wrote up an entry for my diary. One hour. 1307 words.

Do you think it would be cheating to slip them in, up the old word count? Send a character to Portugal for the weekend, perhaps? Hmm. I'll have to think about it.

Maybe if I get really desperate.

2002-11-04T19:18:00.000Z

Remember the cold of my dear husband? I've got it now. I spent most of the weekend drugged to the gills, drunk or both. Today I woke up with a very sore throat and an ear that feels very odd indeed. It hurts, sort of, but not exactly. Just...odd. So I skipped my Portuguese and stayed home and wrote. Actually, I could have gone-- it wasn't that bad, and under normal circumstances I would have. But I'm behind on NaNoWriMo, and I hadn't done my homework, and it hurt to talk, so I stayed home and worked on the novel instead.

All the other little nanos have been busy. I took a light skip through some blogs before sitting down to write this, and some of them are up to around 8000 words. Plus, their Mondays are just getting started, for the most part. On the other hand, I spent the weekend in Porto, getting culturally enriched and, erm, drinking port. And other things; I'd hate to think I'm single minded.

Word Count: 3107.

I'm catching up.

2002-11-01T00:48:00.000Z

So, I did none of those things.

347 words. Go Me!

Go to bed, that is.

2002-10-31T23:31:00.000Z

November 1 is 41 minutes away. I won't be starting. I don't even have names for all my characters yet, and various other things I wanted to do to prepare for this today. I told my husband that I wanted to do some work when I got back. Of course, I couldn't get anything done because he was using the internet. And he's sick, you know, so he gets to spend 18 hours a day fucking around while I just have to suffer. I wouldn't have needed to do so much today, of course, if I could have had some time yesterday without him bugging me, which I didn't get because, hey, he's sick and can spend all day on his computer. Oh sure, he says he wants me to succeed. Provided that is, that he is not slightly inconvenienced in any way.

It's a cold. Get over it.

Meanwhile, I've worked myself into a state of anger and resentment. It wasn't even so bad until I came in to try and work for an hour before midnight, and he came in immediately, demanding to get back on the internet to get a phone number to call in his hours.

He's had all day to do it. He spent all fucking day on his computer and the minute I"m able to get on that's too damn bad for me.

Venting is not helping. I'm close to a state of tears at this point. We leave for Porto in eight and a half hours. We'll be back Sunday night, and I'm tempted to wait and start then, bring my keyboard and PDA and work on stuff if I get the chance. It would put me 5000 words behind, which is an extra 1000 per day this week. Doable, if Thursday wasn't pretty much assed up with meeting and other commitments. But I would keep momentum, I suppose.

That, or I can pull an all nighter, or get up at 4am to at least get started. I don't know what to do, so I'll go pack and decide then.l

2002-10-30T15:59:00.000Z

It's getting really hard not to start writing this thing. Plot ideas, descriptions, whole chunks of dialong keep springing into my head. I don't want them to, not yet. I need to save it, make sure there is something left for November. So I'm trying to keep my mind on other things; occupy it with trivial matters.

The boards aren't helping much, either. Too many people seem to have been plotting their novel out for the last month. They'd have you believe that you've got no chance unless you know what color your characters' second birthday cakes were and you have a detailed, 50 page outline that requires you to do no more than connect the dots.

Bleah.

I've got some characters in varying states of vagueness, an idea of where to start, the odd twist, and no real conception of where I'm headed apart from a happy ending.

I like happy endings.

It'll have to do.

2002-10-30T07:41:00.000Z

Last night, I modified my template. Nothing special, just wanted to add some links to the left hand column. This morning-- nine, ten hours later-- and they still haven't shown up.

Add to this the fact that posting is so damn slow, and usually takes three or even four attempts to accomplish it, and Kat's getting a wee bit annoyed. Let's post this and see if it jumpstarts anything.

2002-10-29T19:52:00.000Z

I wanted to do some more work on characters this evening, but Elvis came home early tonight. Although he claimed he was on the verge of death, he decided a good way to go was to play some stupid marble game for several hours until I brained him with his own laptop.

Hey, if I used mine, I'd never get to 50K words.

Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Aaargh.

If I'm in for a month of this, I really will go insane.

2002-10-28T21:22:00.000Z

Right. Let's see if this works.

Hey, isn't this supposed to be easy?

2002-10-28T20:44:00.000Z

OK, let's try this again, shall we? Blogger seems to have eaten my last (and first!) post.

As I was saying, what good is the entire NaNoWriMo Experience if you can't share it?

I decided to spare my regular readers the agony. Quite frankly, those people go through enough as it is. And it should be nice to have my journey into hysteria documented all in one place, eh?